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Our Premiere Play

They Did Take It With Them, A Play in Three Acts
Copyright (c) by: Anwar Al-Mallah
Written in 2009, They Did Take It With Them is a depression era play, for the modern depression era.  It is a social commentary on politics, language, and today’s technology...just plain funny and amusing in the tradition of Kaufman and Hart's 1936 play You Can't Take It With You.

Although written as a stage play, They Did Take It With Them had its world premiere performance on June 11, 2009 as a reading and was presented as part of the Universalist National Memorial Church's Artists' Series in Washington D.C.

Information about the original cast of They Did Take It With Them can be found here.  The play largely chronicles the struggle of Allen Wrench to find employment and a meaningful relationship in the "apply online" world of today.

A prologue describing the protagonist in more detail can be heard here.  Perhaps the most concise summary of the point made by this play is a line taken directly from its third act "We're all just chasing after money and waiting to get stimulated."

-Anwar Al-Mallah, June 2009		 Cover Image
Act I, Scene I
Watch the introduction

Listen to Act 1, Scene 1 (20 m : 54 s)

Act 1, Scene 1 MP3 Format (7.18 MB)
Act 1, Scene 1 WMA Format (5.49 MB)

  • "If Shakespeare had a My Space page, it would be called Bill's Space too."
  • "How much pee, would P. Did He pee, if P. Did He could pee pee?"
  • "Rhymer Reason, a play by Allen Wrench."
  • "That's one of those names where you expect to be called by something else."
  • "O, Obama, oh won't you bail out me?"
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    Act I, Scene II
    Watch the introduction

    		Listen to Act 1, Scene 2 (20 m : 26 s)

    Act 1, Scene 2 MP3 Format (7.01 MB)
    Act 1, Scene 2 WMA Format (5.34 MB)

  • "Who'd have ever thought that twiddling your thumbs could actually be useful?"
  • "You pinged her Yahoo!?"
  • "Allen Wrench, turned into a vice grip.  Why its a match forged in heaven."
  • "Any chance of getting a package stimulated in Washington sometime soon?"
  • "Tom Jones is at least the same caliber of economic theorist as, say, Adam Smith."
    		•
    Act II, Scene I
    Watch the introduction

    		Listen to Act 2, Scene 1 (21 m : 58 s)

    Act 2, Scene 1 MP3 Format (7.54 MB)
    Act 2, Scene 1 WMA Format (5.69 MB)

  • "Oh, cursed sword of Damocles, how thou hath vexed me!"
  • "When I'm hard at work, I really stand out amongst the crowd."
  • "Britney Spears, and Rolaids."
  • "Apparently Bob Dole and I have at least one thing in common.  Oh baby, baby, how was I supposed to know?"
  • "I'm sure Barney Frank would enjoy seeing Michael Phelps testify before congress in a Speedo."
    		•
    Act II, Scene II
    Watch the introduction

    		Listen to Act 2, Scene 2 (19 m : 51 s)

    Act 2, Scene 2 MP3 Format (6.81 MB)
    Act 2, Scene 2 WMA Format (5.21 MB)

  • "What Your Resume Says About You, Dr. Phil."
  • "Trying to attract an employer is just as difficult as trying to attract a mate."
  • "Ah yes . . . well, the polar bear's lifestyle is not for me.  Although it might be a good way to meet Sarah Palin.  I wonder if she wears any Wet Seal?"
  • "The measure of a man has got nothing to do with the hotness of his rod."
  • "Yes, I can see how Spiderman's name would be good to use on the web."
    		•
    Act III, Scene I
    Watch the introduction

    		Listen to Act 3, Scene 1 (24 m : 14 s)

    Act 3, Scene 1 MP3 Format (8.32 MB)
    Act 3, Scene 1 WMA Format (6.30 MB)

  • "I wonder whatever happened to the Bulls and the Mooses?"
  • "Why Mr. T., what a pleasure to meet you and your team."
  • "My husband's got a Wii at home, but I never play with it."
  • "It's a mode, the mixolydian mode, not to be confused with the Depeche Mode."
  • "Do sub-prime mortgages ring any bells?"
    		•
    Act III, Scene II
    Watch the introduction

    		Listen to Act 3, Scene 2 (23 m : 41 s)

    Act 3, Scene 2 MP3 Format (8.13 MB)
    Act 3, Scene 2 WMA Format (6.27 MB)

  • "Well, we have a swimming pool out back . . . maybe she can wear a bikini and stimulate your package."
  • "We're all just chasing after money and waiting to get stimulated."
  • "Yes, I'm still waiting for something to trickle down from them."
  • "We decided to take Uncle Allen's advice and protect that certain part of our male anatomy."
  • "It's nice to meet a man who's at least as interested in stimulating the gray part of his anatomy as, well, that certain part of his anatomy."
    		•

    Closing Monologue and Credits